The Secret of Half-Arsed Parenting

With special guest:

• Dr Susie O’Brien
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

There is a toasted sandwich in the cover picture of her book and that leads our guest Dr Susie O’Brien to tell us that a toasted sandwich is a quite acceptable dinner alternative. This is the world of Susie O’Brien where parents can escape all that guilt about not being the best parent in the world and just start enjoying their children.

In Susie O’Brien’s new book The Secret of Half-Arsed Parenting we get an insight that is fun. It is also comforting to know that the conclusions are drawn from research all around the world. And most parents will find sections where they have to say to themselves ‘No doubt about it, that resembles me.’

We all have some idea of the message conveyed in the title but it does not mean doing a bad job. It really means protecting our offspring from bullies and head lice but not from boredom and hunger between meals.

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Men of Business Academy

With special guest:

• Marco Renai
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

What comes across very clearly when we speak with Marco Renai is that he is a ball of energy.

After Marco left school he had a path available to him in his family’s catering business. His first solo business venture was to set up a gym where members could improve their physical condition and wellness under Marco’s guidance. This was Marco’s first attempt at interacting with the community but alas Covid 19 struck. When the members stopped coming, the business folded.

This is where Marco’s strong family background and personal experience in the field of education shaped what happened next. While Marco had struggled with the discipline and uncompromising system of education he always had his loving and supportive family to fall back on. But when he was asked to volunteer some mentoring to local youth in the Gold Coast region of Queensland he realised that for many young men this safety net was not available. Sure enough, for many of the young men dropping out of the education system led on to big trouble with society and the law.

Having recognised the problem Marco set about doing something about it. Marco rounded up some 100 local businessmen for an Italian lunch and over a pasta or two came up with a plan to raise $1million to help these young men. Being a force of nature this daunting sum did not pose a problem.

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High Adventure

With special guest:

• Mike Allsop
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Mike Allsop was worried that marriage would spell the end of the adventurous life he had been living. He also had experienced a difficult family upbringing himself. So when he met the love of his life he certainly did not rush into that long walk down the aisle. But these days he has the “full disaster” with his wife Wendy and three beautiful children. And there are lessons to be learned from Mike’s progress that we can all appreciate.

Talking to Mike makes you feel like you were there with him when he reached the summit of Mt Everest with nobody in front of him. We learn about the setbacks when he was getting ready to run 7 marathons in 7 days on 7 continents starting with his belief that he wasn’t really a marathon runner.

This love of setting and reaching goals started when he was a child and he saw an Air New Zealand jet passing overhead. He had the goal of becoming a pilot and finished up getting his pilot’s licence before he had his motor vehicle licence. By gaining the confidence of some airline pilots he went on to achieve his dream.

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The Boy Crisis

With special guest:

• Dr Warren Farrell
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

The big issues of today include Hamas on the international stage, gangs of youths in our cities and disengaged sons in our families. Our guest today has found a common link in each of these and that is the preponderance of dad deprivation for both the boys and girls involved.

Dr Farrell has been researching for 11 years in order to produce his latest book and some of his findings are eye opening. For example we discover that the downward spiral of boys in the developed world is leading to physical changes. Young men of today have a sperm count of only 50% what their grandfathers had at the same age and it is dropping by 1.5% every year.

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Top Blokes Foundation

With special guest:

• Melissa Abu-Gazaleh
  … in conversation with Bill Kable
  

We cannot avoid the bad news stories about young men. The figures show that 82.6% of articles in the press about young men are negative.

In today’s program we speak with Melissa Abu-Gazaleh, the founder and CEO of Top Blokes Foundation, who counters that negative stereotype by encouraging the young men to become “top blokes”. Melissa argues that young men can be a force for good; they are a resource that is largely untapped.

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The Prettiest Horse in the Glue Factory

With special guest:

• Corey White
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Luckily for our guest today he always believed he was special. That belief was severely tested before too long.

Corey White grew up knowing that his father was in jail and his mother was a heroin addict. Both parents disappeared from his early life and his life journey was about to become a roller-coaster with no guarantees.

Corey is never one to sugar coat his experiences. He had to sell himself to totally unsuitable foster parent candidates in the hope they would take him in. Once in a family he was subjected to cruelty, dysfunction and in once case sexual abuse. At school he was bullied, it was all grim and he wasn’t even 10 years old.

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Anxious Kids

With special guest:

• Michael Grose
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Michael Grose and his co-author Dr Jodi Richardson are often asked when making parenting presentations if there is an epidemic of anxiety among our young people. If you were asked the same question you might immediately say yes but before he answers that question for us in today’s program, we ask our guest what it is exactly that we are talking about. Is anxiety the same as depression? Is anxiety built into us? When does it become harmful? What can we do about it?

In his book Anxious Kids: How children can turn their anxiety into resilience, Michael Grose speaks from his own first-hand knowledge as well as his professional qualifications and wide experience. Michael tells us that parents can learn how to recognise anxiety in their children. Recognition is a first and necessary step and parents are best placed to do so although that closeness brings with it responsibility because anxiety runs in families.

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Ten Leadership Lessons You Must Teach Your Teenager

With special guest:

• Dr Tim Hawkes
  …in conversation with Bill Kable and Ken Thompson

What the world needs now is leadership and that is our topic today.

Our guest in this program was one of Australia’s leading educators whose book Ten Leadership Lessons You Must Teach Your Teenager takes a different approach to the topic of leadership. This book is not addressed to the business people trying to get higher on the greasy pole of corporate success. Dr Hawkes writes for mums and dads to share some wisdom with their teenage children.

Based on his great experience from many years teaching and leading thousands of students Dr Hawkes provides parents with realistic expectations and their children with challenges that the contemporary teen can reasonably be expected to achieve.

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Help! My Son Hates School

With special guest:

• Janet Allison
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

After listening to this show many men will be wishing that they could have had Janet Allison as their teacher in years gone by. Janet speaks to us from Portland Oregon in the USA where she has founded the organisation Boys Alive! to benefit teachers and children in the education process. Janet’s warm style is engaging and inspiring.

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Mothering Our Boys

With special guest:

• Maggie Dent
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

It is ten years since we last spoke to Maggie Dent and in that time the pressure on our boys has only got worse.

Now more than ever we need a consistent voice, a sensible voice backed by extensive research, in fact a boy champion. Fortunately this is recognised in the huge reaction given to Maggie’s new book Mothering Our Boys: A guide for mums of sons and in public forums that Maggie delivers around the nation. It is a privilege for us to be able to share Maggie’s thoughts in this special program.

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The Secret of Half-Arsed Parenting

With special guest:

• Dr Susie O’Brien
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

There is a toasted sandwich in the cover picture of her book and that leads our guest Dr Susie O’Brien to tell us that a toasted sandwich is a quite acceptable dinner alternative. This is the world of Susie O’Brien where parents can escape all that guilt about not being the best parent in the world and just start enjoying their children.

In Susie O’Brien’s new book The Secret of Half-Arsed Parenting we get an insight that is fun. It is also comforting to know that the conclusions are drawn from research all around the world. And most parents will find sections where they have to say to themselves ‘No doubt about it, that resembles me.’

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Sam’s Best Shot

With special guest:

• Dr James Best
  …in conversation with Bill Kable
  

How many Dads will walk away from their jobs for six months, sell their home and then travel to the wilds of Africa in the hope that it will be good for their son?

We like to think most Dads would do it. Today we get to speak to Dr James Best who did exactly that with his 14 year old son Sam. Sam said he went away as a boy and came back as a person summing up what his parents had hoped for when they embarked on this adventure.

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Men of Honour

With special guest:

• Glen Gerreyn
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Our guest today is Glen Gerreyn a man by choice as distinct from being born male. This personal development did not happen when he became a champion athlete but rather by some important choices that Glen has made in his life. So what does it mean to be a man, a real man? And what are these choices?

Glen has spoken to groups around Australia and around the world on the topic of men of honour and some of the content probably comes under the heading of “secret men’s business”. In these talks no subject is taboo. Because so many fatherless boys in our community do not have a mentor they can confide in, Glen often finds that no-one else has ever spoken to our young men so frankly in language they understand.

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Fight Like A Pro

With special guest:

• Gavin Topp
  … in conversation with Bill Kable
  

Today’s show is a knockout! Our guest is Gavin Topp and he tells us about his training program called Fight Like a Pro which he runs on the Gold Coast of Queensland.

It is not an overstatement to say that the program has changed lives because on top of the physical aspects of training hard with a group of fellow amateurs Gavin looks for the mental changes in his charges. You might not expect to hear life lessons from a professional boxer but as numerous testimonials on the website of Fight Like a Pro will confirm Gavin is a bit of a philosopher as well as a hard physical taskmaster.

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How much father? How have dads evolved since the 1930s?

With special guest:

• Dr Peter West
  …in conversation with Glen Poole
  

How have dads evolved since the 1930s? In the 1990s Dr Peter West interviewed a wide variety of men who grew up in the decades between the Depression and the final decade on the 20th Century. The result of those interviews was the book Fathers, Sons and Lovers: Men Talk About Their Lives from the 1930s to Today. From footballers to policemen, from railway workers to farmers, he provided a rare glimpse into the lived realities or everyday Australian dads.

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The Making of Men

With special guest:

• Dr Arne Rubinstein
  …in conversation with Bill Kable, Ken Thompson, and Glen Poole
  

“If we don’t initiate our boys they will burn down the village to feel the heat.” This is an African proverb quoted by our guest today Dr Arne Rubinstein that could describe the situation for young men today in Australia and other societies far from Africa.

The Making of Men is a book that Dr Arne Rubinstein has written after seeing first-hand in his medical practice the disasters that can befall boys who are not initiated into life as a man in the community. Arne recognises the qualities valued in young boys when they are naturally loving, energetic, funny, creative and sensitive. What happens then, when so many kids get into trouble as teenagers?

In this program we talk about one of the most important ways in which the community or village can play a role in bringing the boy through to being a valuable man in the community.

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Schools of Fish

With special guest:

• Alan Sampson
  …in conversation with Bill Kable and Ken Thompson
  

Schools of Fish won the 2015 Finch Memoir Prize for author Alan Sampson, a Queenslander, who by telling us about his own experiences lets us find out much about the importance of a father’s relationship with his children. A big part of the story relates to Alan’s role as Principal at the well-known Cavendish Road State High School in Brisbane. There are times at school when personal courage is required as well as unshakable integrity if favourable results are to be achieved.

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Ten Conversations You Must Have With Your Son

With special guest:

• Dr Tim Hawkes OAM
  …in conversation with Bill Kable
  

Parents are all too familiar with the difficulties of relating to their sons in a language that they understand while they grow from boys to men. Our guest today is Dr Tim Hawkes who as Headmaster of The King’s School was responsible for 1500 boys. Dr Hawkes held this position from 1998 to 2017 adding to a wealth of experience gained in England and Australia on how boys can best reach their potential as men.

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How to Raise a Man

With special guest:

• Megan De Beyer
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Something many of us wonder about from time to time is what turns a boy into a man. With the title of Megan de Beyer’s new book being How to Raise a Man there was no hiding from this question and Megan dives straight in.

And then there is the most common issue for parents raising young men - how to get more than a grunt in lieu of conversation. In these Covid restricted times as we are forced to spend more time at home this question become even more important. The best approach is to treat this time as a challenge rather than a threat and Megan has lots of suggestions on making this time productive. In brief Megan encourages us to look at ourselves more in this dynamic relationship rather than trying to fix something in our young men.

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FLY

With special guest:

• Jai Hobbs
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Covid 19 is just one more hurdle for our young people coming out of school. They already have to face up to serious competition to progress in a chosen career. If they can get through University they face a HECS debt and what about the housing market.

Our guest today Jai Hobbs decided to do something practical to help the young people get on top of all that. With his wife Marlies, Jai has written a manual called FLY which stands for financially literate youth. This is what he is striving for.

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