Fatherhood: Stories about being a Dad

With special guest:

• William McInnes
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

In today’s program we go behind the public face of William McInnes. We do not speak to Max Connors from SeaChange, we speak to William McInnes the Dad from Queensland about his real life love of being a father to his son and daughter.

We get to hear lots of stories as included in William’s new book Fatherhood: Stories about being A Dad. As William tells us, being a Dad is a serious business but it is at the same time a funny, heart-warming and at times scary experience.

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Surviving Adolescents

With special guest:

• Elly Robinson
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

All parents realise on leaving the maternity ward that there is no manual that comes from the hospital with instructions for a new baby. The parents just strap themselves in for the rapid growth and development of this new and totally dependent child.

Ten years later with the coming of adolescence there is another period of risky growth and development. The age group from 10 to 19 calls upon a whole new skill set to deal with challenges some of which are familiar and some that are new to this century.

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Being Black ’n Chicken, & Chips

With special guest:

• Matt Okine
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Matt Okine’s book Being Black ‘n Chicken, & Chips is based on his award-winning stand-up show and is at once heart-breaking and hilarious.

Matt provides a bird’s eye view of life as a 12 year old when things start unravelling, just as that boy/child is working out some important stuff. He is working on There is the relationship with his father that has never really developed; there is a potential heart stopping girlfriend on the fringes; and there is a girl next door who is more of a friend than his male companions. Finally and most importantly he has to negotiate the changing relationship with his mother.

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Deadly Connections

With special guest:

• Keenan Mundine
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Dreamer, nothing but a dreamer. That might be where it started for our guest today Keenan Mundine after a beginning in life that really didn’t give him a chance.

But after Keenan had spent the first half of his life in the criminal justice system he came to a realisation. Keenan either had to change his ways or face up to spending his life behind bars. Fortunately for us and for Keenan he decided to make a worthwhile contribution to society. And so was born Deadly Connections where he is the co-founder along with his wife Carly.

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The Resilience Project

With special guest:

• Hugh van Cuylenburg
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

When Hugh van Cuylenburg went to India as a volunteer teacher he did not expect to be on the receiving end of the learning process. At first reluctant to even be in India he soon found that he was learning from his students how to develop the psychological foundation for success in all educational and physical pursuits.

Hugh’s trip finished up being full of surprises. He was surrounded by so much poverty yet there was also happiness and contentment. Working on his observations Hugh was able to develop The Resilience Project for application in Australia and backed up his approach with technical qualifications obtained by completing a Master’s Degree at University.

In Australia many school children are anxious and depressed. They spend too much time looking at their mobile phones and other devices. Individual sports people such as some of our leading cricketers are needing to take time off to improve their mental health and sporting teams have earned a reputation for misbehaving when they seem to have everything presented on a platter. So if something is going wrong here what can be done?

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Mr Ordinary Goes to Jail

With special guest:

• Wil Patterson
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Mr Ordinary Goes to Jail is really a story about choices.

Some choices we hope we will never have to make. Once made they have significant consequences. Wil Paterson found himself facing temptation at a time when he had financial pressures at home and he made a fateful choice.

Wil was at work on an ordinary day. Part of his job was that he was expected to cancel his employer’s cheques when the payee had not been located.

But on this day a returned cheque for $5000 made out in his own name came across his desk and instead of cancelling it Wil decided after a few days to deposit in his own bank account. If it happened that once it could happen again and again until in the end $300,000 had been taken. When Wil was caught, the feeling strangely enough was relief even though he knew it would be the end of his life as he had known it.

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The Boy from Baradine

With special guest:

• Dr Craig Emerson
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

This is a rare opportunity. We do not often hear a successful politician being hailed for giving a shockingly personal honest and compelling reflection with brilliant insights. Our guest today is Craig Emerson who opens up about his rollercoaster ride from Baradine a small town in north western NSW to the corridors of power in Canberra.

In his book The Boy from Baradine we follow Craig on his journey. We hear how we are all shaped by our upbringing but this does not mean that we are imprisoned by it. Craig and his brother Lance were subjected to random acts of physical and mental cruelty from their mother and a father who was unable to help while he battled his own demons.

Yet from this unpromising start in life Craig was able to benefit from a good education. By a combination of hard work and some good fortune along the way Craig found himself advising the Prime Minister and bravely standing up for what he thought was right even when under pressure.

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The High-Conflict Co-Parenting Survival Guide

With special guest:

• Megan Hunter
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Megan Hunter is the co-author with Andrea Larochelle of a new book The High-Conflict Co-Parenting Survival Guide with the sub-title Reclaim Your Life One Week at a Time.

Perhaps this book would not be necessary if everyone followed the recommendations contained in Megan’s earlier book Dating Radar: Why Your Brain Says Yes to “The One” Who Will Make Your Life Hell. However as Megan writes in Week 1 you cannot unconsciously or consciously rewrite history in an attempt to save yourself (and your kids) from the present circumstance. It is what it is.

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The Father Hood

With special guest:

• Luke Benedictus
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Professor Richard Fletcher says it’s the most exciting time in history to be a dad. But there is an old problem of where does that modern dad get his riding instructions.

Our guest today is Luke Benedictus who like so many others was faced with this problem. So Luke got together with two mates, Jeremy Macvean and Andrew McUtchen, to set up The Fatherhood, a new destination for modern dads.

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The Boy Crisis

With special guest:

• Dr Warren Farrell
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

The big issues of today include ISIS on the international stage, gangs of youths in our cities and disengaged sons in our families. Our guest today has found a common link in each of these and that is the preponderance of dad deprivation for both the boys and girls involved.

Dr Farrell has been researching for 11 years in order to produce his latest book and some of his findings are eye opening. For example we discover that the downward spiral of boys in the developed world is leading to physical changes. Young men of today have a sperm count of only 50% what their grandfathers had at the same age and it is dropping by 1.5% every year.

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Five Years From Now

With special guest:

• Paige Toon
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

In today’s episode we speak to author and citizen of the world Paige Toon who has written a novel exploring the relationship between two children from opposite ends of the world and their fathers.

We drop in on these lives every five years to see how things have changed and we find there are plenty of surprises as we trace the emotional development of the main characters.

The fathers in the story start from different points. One is close to his daughter and always has been. The other did not get to meet his son until he was seven. Yet both children see the importance of that father/child relationship as they make their way through life. The book is all about relationships and how timing can be all important.

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A Long Path to Freedom

With special guest:

• Jeff McMullen
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Our guest today is Jeff McMullen, a household name in Australia after his many years on television for both the ABC and Channel 9. For more than 20 years Jeff has campaigned for the Indigenous people in Australia and other countries.

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High Adventure

With special guest:

• Mike Allsop
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Mike Allsop was worried that marriage would spell the end of the adventurous life he had been living. He also had experienced a difficult family upbringing himself. So when he met the love of his life he certainly did not rush into that long walk down the aisle. But these days he has the “full disaster” with his wife Wendy and three beautiful children. And there are lessons to be learned from Mike’s progress that we can all appreciate.

Talking to Mike makes you feel like you were there with him when he reached the summit of Mt Everest with nobody in front of him. We learn about the setbacks when he was getting ready to run 7 marathons in 7 days on 7 continents starting with his belief that he wasn’t really a marathon runner.

This love of setting and reaching goals started when he was a child and he saw an Air New Zealand jet passing overhead. He had the goal of becoming a pilot and finished up getting his pilot’s licence before he had his motor vehicle licence. By gaining the confidence of some airline pilots he went on to achieve his dream.

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Dear Dad

With special guest:

• Samuel Johnson OAM
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Samuel Johnson gave his contributors only one restriction when he contacted them about writing a letter to their Dad for a book he was editing. Their letters had to start with the words “Dear Dad …”. Faced with this task what would you say? Samuel himself is such a noteworthy character and he is candid about the relationship he had with his own father. Samuel wrote his own contribution as well as editing those from 85 other luminaries.

Samuel likes taking on a challenge in a good cause. When his sister Connie was diagnosed with breast cancer she suggested that he should unicycle around Australia. With that completed he said what next? The great thing for us is that it lead to this beautiful book called Dear Dad.

This project was supported by men and women who were all keen to share their fascinating stories. The contributors provided their stories free of charge to help Samuel in his quest to raise $10million for cancer research.

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From Fiji to The Voice

With special guest:

• Voli K
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

In the program today we speak to Voli K who recently distinguished himself by being a standout performer singing on the TV program The Voice.

iTaukei is what the Fijian people call themselves and we have a picture in our minds of what this means. We may think of the Fijian Rugby team or other representative sportsmen who are built like trees and run like gazelles. We also think of their big smiles in black faces saying Bula a thousand times a day.

What we do not think of is a white skinned Fijian. Voli K was born in Fiji and has the skin condition of albinism which affects a small proportion of Fijians, other Melanesians in the Pacific basin and people all around the world.

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An Awesome Ride: Through a father’s eyes

With special guest:

• Cameron Miller
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

In 2012 Shaun Miller made a YouTube video in his bedroom called MY FINAL GOODBYE. In this video Shaun managed in only 2 minutes and 54 seconds to get out some important messages before it was too late.

Shaun was only 17 years of age but he knew that he had at most a few weeks to live because of his heart condition. He said that he had no regrets and that we should live life to the fullest. We should express our love to the people around us. Importantly he said to make sure that his dad Cameron was OK.

Overnight there were 30,000 hits and a week later that number had gone to over 1 million. Now it is over 7 million. Clearly this is an extraordinary person.

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The Prettiest Horse in the Glue Factory

With special guest:

• Corey White
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Luckily for our guest today he always believed he was special. That belief was severely tested before too long.

Corey White grew up knowing that his father was in jail and his mother was a heroin addict. Both parents disappeared from his early life and his life journey was about to become a roller-coaster with no guarantees.

Corey is never one to sugar coat his experiences. He had to sell himself to totally unsuitable foster parent candidates in the hope they would take him in. Once in a family he was subjected to cruelty, dysfunction and in once case sexual abuse. At school he was bullied, it was all grim and he wasn’t even 10 years old.

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Too Soon, Too Late

With special guests:

• Ralph & Kathy Kelly
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

There is widespread knowledge of the July 2012 attack on 18 year old Thomas Kelly. The sorrow felt by the community was compounded by the loss through suicide of Thomas’s brother Stuart four years later.

Ralph and Kathy Kelly have experienced the unimaginable but as a measure of the innate qualities of them and their family they have, in the time since, made great strides in reducing the dangers on the streets of Sydney.

In their book Too Soon, Too Late Kathy and Ralph tell how they explored what happened on those July days in 2012 and 2016. They talk about the care and assistance they have received from people such as former NSW Premiers Barry O’Farrell and Mike Baird. They also reveal the human side of the people on the front line such as the NSW Police Force Homicide Squad. Within themselves Kathy and Ralph found the bravery missing from anonymous “trolls” who did not like some of the changes to our drinking laws even if they resulted in a dramatic reduction in hospital admissions on a Saturday night.

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SHINE for Kids

With special guest:

• Dennis van Someren
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Dennis van Someren is getting the word out that we have a crisis in the community, a crisis involving some of our most vulnerable children that impacts on all of us.

Governments have responded to concerns about crime rates by building more jails with there being nearly 40,000 inmates in overcrowded jails around the country. This is up from 21,000 inmates only 10 years ago. At a cost of $292 per inmate per day the numbers are frightening. But when you consider that these inmates have in the order of 60,000 children and that the children of prisoners are 6 times more likely to end up in prison themselves you can see the problem.

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Anxious Kids

With special guest:

• Michael Grose
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Michael Grose and his co-author Dr Jodi Richardson are often asked when making parenting presentations if there is an epidemic of anxiety among our young people. If you were asked the same question you might immediately say yes but before he answers that question for us in today’s program, we ask our guest what it is exactly that we are talking about. Is anxiety the same as depression? Is anxiety built into us? When does it become harmful? What can we do about it?

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